Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Ten things I have learned during my almost one year of marriage...

This Sunday will mark the one year anniversary of my marriage to the beautiful Sarah. It has been a year marked with joy, newness, happiness on one side and sorrow, emptiness and sadness on the other. I suppose most years will be like that huh? So here is my Top Ten list for my first year of marriage and the things that happened:

10. It is amazing to have someone with you, beside you and behind you in everything that you do. Going through the divorce of two of our good friends with Sarah really solidified just how important it was to simply be there for each other. This situation marks most of the bad things that have happened over this past year.

9. Sarah loves details and stories. She could tell you the shirt someone had on and if it was wrinkled. She loves giving out too much info and loves to do it often! It makes me laugh when we are somewhere and she starts going on and on about little things that this person has no earthly need of knowing! It's all in the little stuff!

8. Marriage is give and take. There were expectations coming into the marriage that have been missed and some that have been exceeded. Part of marriage is just learning that you do have expectations and when they are met it isn't always the other persons fault.

7. Sarah is a fierce animal (wolverine, badger, etc) when someone messes with me. It even scares me a little. She so "has my back" that after I talk with her about something that someone has done I usually have to calm her down! Arrrgggghhh!

6. Men and women are more different than what I had already known. I will just never understand things like the Oxygen network, Hallmark movies, Lifetime network or why women are so fixated on what other people are doing! Almost every time we go through a checkout line, I am putting the food on the belt while my wife is reading about this celeb and what they did and whose gown they wore! This leaves me scratching my head...

5. True love is about how you feel, it is about how you make the other person feel. I have felt no greater love for Sarah than after I had done something that just made her day. I absolutely love making her smile and seeing her happy. That is true love.

4. I couldn't have married any other woman in the world. Without a doubt, I know that God put us together and let me tell ya...he knew what he was doing! Sarah is amazing, beautiful, compassionate, caring, understanding, hardworking, and did I mention beautiful?!

3. I wouldn't be half the Youth Pastor I am today without Sarah. She has done so much in this respect that I can't choose just a few things to talk about. The conversations about how I felt and my insecurities and how she has built me up truly is a God thing.

2. Married life is busy. Having what,...5-6 different families to try and get to their events and spend time with them is a havoc especially around hte holidays. On top of that, ministry is a constant thing. Sarah has so graciously adapted to this over this year and we are still trying to put this in balance as we look ahead over the next few years and the possibility of children. Not soon, but over the next few years, and stop asking! :)

The number one thing I've learned over my first year of marriage...

1. Communication is the key to any relationship. Included in this is: tone of voice, saying things a certain way, not saying things, and the ability to state a problem you have without starting an argument. Communication is something that every couple needs to work on. I think that for the most part we do a good job of communicating with each other and it has gotten better over the last 4-6 months.

I love my wife. My wife loves me. Here's to 50 more years of love and marriage!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Swinl,

Am I the only one leaving comments these days??

Your post today brought a few tears. And of course you're so right about Sarah... but I will say (again) I'm so glad she's married to you.

Happy birthday with love to my swinl: Andy,

Peg

Anonymous said...

You certainly have learned a lot over this past year. You and Sarah have come a long way....and it seems you are 'right on the mark.' Keep up the good work, as a husband, a youth pastor, etc.

You are lucky to have Sarah in your life. We are glad she is part of our family. Seems like she has always been.....

Hope your birthday was a good one, and your anniversary trip was a great one!

Love,

Lana