10 Things I have learned this year...

10.  That God doesn't give us patience.  He gives us situations where we need to use patience in. 
          This time last year we were frustrtated and upset with the whole baby situation.  We had been trying for nearly a year and each month the excitement would soon be followed with sadness and the sadness with frustration and the...well you get the picture.  That happened for many months on end.  In the end, God gave us the best gift on Christmas day either one of us could have ever asked for.  There was another big situation in our lives that caused a lot of stress and had people questioning my integrity.  However, after standing up and realizing that my integrity is not mine but God's and that he is in control of everything, I trusted Him and the situation took care of itself.  Patience paid off many times over. 

9.  There are times in life when all you can do is trust that God is good and has the best for you in mind.
          There have been moments over the past year where we didn't know what to do and really had to lean on God and Him giving us wisdom.  I think that my generation, in it's search for personal freedom and it's obession with self reliance, is doing itself a huge disservice by not asking those around them for wisdom.  The Bible doesn't cover ever area in our lives.  There are things that we face that those people never faced and vice versa.  However, we often times just make decisions and fail to ask those that God has put around us what to do.  Often times, God uses other people to impart the wisdom that we seek.  His word is true and many times it talks about asking for wisdom, and I think that when we fail to do so, we shortchange ourselves and those around us of the chance of becoming more like Christ. 

8.  All the parenting books in the world can't teach you how to be a parent.
          I never once thought that being a parent would be easy.  I thought I knew what I was getting into.  I thought I had gone without sleep and would be ok.  However, there is nothing that prepares you to have a kid other than having already had a kid!  Even then I bet it will be different.  Still, those stupid books tell you that the baby is supposed to be this long and weigh this much and be doing this or that and it makes you paranoid.  I hate baby books!  Pregnancy books are ok because you really can't see what is going on or not going on.  Those books say to do this or that but don't tell you what to do when you clip a thumb instead of a thumbnail or how to stay calm when your baby just let a bomb off and it reached her clothes!  There is only one thing that preoares you for being a parent: experience.  I can't wait to see what I haven't learned as little Kate grows up. 

7.  Family is uber-important and time is short. 
         I had never lost a close family member.  I lost a grade school friend once.  I had been around people that had died but never had I lost someone as close as my Grandpa Andy.  Some times the timing of life just punches you in the gut and leaves you gasping for air.  Kate was born in early September and the week before we are taking her to see him, Grandpa takes a turn for the worse and never recovers.  Kate never met her Great Grandpa.  He never met her.  That one still stings the worst.  My grandpa's passing sent me into a month long funk.  It also really cemented just how short life is and makes you really put into perspective what is important and the smallness of what most of us consider so urgent.  We run around in our little circles that we call our lives so panicked and pressured because we have placed such an importance on some of the most trivial things.  We let our jobs or our houses or our belongings and the pursuit of those things become of the greatest importance and fail to prioritize those things that mean the most in the end.  I miss Grandpa and wish that I would have gone over to see him more often.  It wasn't high on my list...but it should have been. What is low on your list that you need to bump up?

6.  You are either coming into a valley or leaving one. 
          If you know me, you know that I bleed Cream and Crimson...I love IU basketball.  This past season they went 6 and 25.  They won 6 games and lost 25 games.  I taped every one and watched it.  Every second.  That season taught me a few things about valleys.  One, you sometimes hit valleys because of unforeseen things.  However, often times you go through valleys because you are missing the signs or ignoring them in your own life.  Two, losing sucks.  I hate losing and the way it makes you feel.  Three, building things the right way and doing things the right was is always the way to go.  Their season made me be thankful for each win they had but in life it helped me savor each "win" that I experienced too. 

5.  Time changes everything.
          I miss certain times in life.  Needtobreathe sings a song called "Stones Under Rushing Water" that goes, "The years go by like stones under rushing water, you only know when they're gone" and it rings true.  We don't have a lot of close friends up here and the ones we do have we don't spend much time with.  It is hard living life without family and friends nearby.  Thank goodness we have a certain family in our church that is just like family, well, they are family, just with a different last name.  Anyway, nothing ever stays the same.  You go back to your school, or your old job or even the house you used to live in and nothing is ever how you see it in your mind.  This causes me to do one thing:  enjoy what you have right now.  Enjoy the crap out of it!  Squeeze every ounce of joy and fun and love that you can get from it.  Hug it and pet it and be present in the moment.  Stop wishing life away or your life will just get washed away. Nothing ever stays the same...cause it wouldn't ever be the same! 


4.  Worry gets you nowhere. 
          I can't tell you how many things that came up in our lvies this year where we had the opportunity to trust God and rest in Him that we traded in for worry and fear.  It is not that we didn't trust Him, we did. Just not enough at times.  First it was the baby.  Then the lease inspections.  Then finding a car.  Then finances when baby comes.  Then people attacked us and tried to knock us down.  Then the C-section.  Then the heart murmur.  Time after time that worry gets you nothing.  It is an action that often times feels like the only thing that feels right at the time but when the trial is over leaves you feel foolish and stressed.  It causes the joy of the moment to be squelched and lessened because you have the residue of all those stolen moments of worry.  Jesus talked about it.  I know this truth...and it is something that I will continue to work on in my life. 

3. I need more vacations to the beach. 
          Who knew that when I married Sarah I would be lucky enough to have recieved such great vacation family to visit with each year?  I can't imagine having a better group of people to go on vacation with than MFF and Megan.  It is always nice to spend time with Peggy too.  I wish that we could spend a month down there and relax...Lord knows I need it!  I had never gone on many vacations to the beach until I married Sarah.  Now, I feel like I am missing out if I go on vacation to somewhere that isn't MB!  It is like going to your favorite restaurant and ordering something new and missing your favorite food that you always order (yes, boneless Applebee's wings, I am talking to you)!  Viva La Myrtle Beach!  Viva La Vacation!  

2.  Babies change everything.
          Sleep? Check.  Eating? Check.  Traveling? Check.  Church and youth group? Check.  It is amazing how something so small has such an impact on all phases of life.  Kate wakes up, I wake up.  Kate wants to eat, I drop what I am doing and feed her.  Kate can't be left alone at home while I run errands, I pack her up, get her a bottle, a burp cloth, a blanket, a hat, her pacifier, a change of clothes, wipes, diapers...  lol.  I can't imagine what single parents go through.  I am blessed to be on this journey with Sarah.  She is such a great mom like everyone that knew her knew she would be.  Kate is such a blessing and it is all worth it...


1.  God has given me such an amazing friend and wife.
             In college before we dated, Sarah and I went to Wal-Mart.  I needed some toothpaste and some other things.  I remember this story well because of the thought that I had during that trip...we go over to the toothpaste aisle and I am trying to decide and while I am randomly looking at which tube to buy, Sarah picks one out for me.  I thought to myself, "She is going to be a good mom!"  And boy was I right.  Kate is blessed to have Sarah as her mom and I am more than blessed that Sarah puts up with me.  God knew that it would take just the right person to love me and be the pastor's wife and direction-giver and the putter-upper with the yelling during IU games and the person that would say the exact same thing that I say it...that I needed.  Sarah is that woman.  She is everything that I was looking for a wife and everything that I never knew I needed.