Surreal

It seems like I am waiting for something to happen. I am not sure what it is, but something. I am not anxious or worried about it. Still, it feels in my soul that something is coming. Maybe it is because of what I posted about yesterday (so much change happening). It is not a bad feeling. Just a feeling that something big/bad/good/small is going to happen. I guess it has to doesn't it? Things are always changing and I would be nieve to think that they wouldn't. I mean when you think about it, don't we usually get surprised by things that are just part of life? Changing jobs, getting pregnant, someone getting sick, family members or friends making decisions that affect many others. Things always will happen that way.

Lately, with the whole divorce thing with our friends, Sarah and I have been kind of discouraged because they were our closest friends up here or over here (depending on where you are when you read this). I miss my friends from time to time that are in Anderson and my family...I recently got on myspace.com and they are all on there talking about how they are doing things together and going here and there and it has really affected me. I miss having friends that come over and do nothing really. I get that every once in a while when the SPEDS come up but I am usually doing an overnighter so I dont get much QT with them. So in reality, I don't really have many friends like that anymore. Sarah is in the same boat. She was working a lot with orientation but now that that is over she is feeling that same thing. Her friends all live together in Indy and she really has no friends here. Well, thats that. I have now said whats been on my heart for a while.

SMYG.

Punched in the gut...

I guess my posts come slower and slower now. Things are going really good. I am feeling a little of those summer time blues...in the spring...I guess it is because of all the drama around me. I am ready for no drama and some time where we can just be... I ordered a new computer today so it should be coming soon.

Some things I have learned recently:

1. St. Patrick's Day is huge for Catholics!
2. Dogs like their own puke
3. My dog is stupid
4. Marriage is fun
5. I don't like change as much as I thought I did...explain: it seems that a lot of people are jumping ship on the things that they have been doing (church secretary, treasurer, one of the youth sponsors leaving...etc etc etc)
6. Most of the friends of my teenage years have websites on myspace.com
7. Working together with people is so much easier than working against them



SMYG.

Computer issues...

Hey, sorry for the lack of posting! My computer or modem one of the two, got zapped over the weekend and I have been too busy at work to post anything. Sorry.



So here are some nuggets of my week:


1. Last week was fun, and refreshing. Spending time with Kerry was great.
2. We (Kerry and I) had an amazing discussion Friday night on the way home about God and salvation and stuff...it was a long time coming.
3. Indiana about gave me a heart attack last night
4. Our best friends up here in Plymouth, who were in our wedding, are and have been over the past month getting divorced. So pray that God would send Sarah especially, a woman friend that is much needed.
5. Sarah is done with orientation, finally! Good and bad...
6. I have no motivation to work out anymore
7. We got a new washer and dryer
8. We are looking at getting me a newer car (maybe a truck or suv)
9. I love my wife!
10. I am so thankful for family. My mom made it through her surgery and is on the road to recovery.
11. I am rooting for Taylor Hicks (yes, the old lookin' guy) on American Idol!


So there you have it...my life in a nut shell.
SMYG.

Leadership

Back at IWU, one of my professors asked a question that recently has been haunting me, daily. It is a question that could and probably will affect the outcome of my entire life. It is a question that people in leadership should ask themselves often at the beginning of their careers. So here's the question:


Are great leaders born or are they made?


You see, I don't consider myself to be a GREAT pastor. I don't see myself as being someone that leads a mega-church some day. Right now, I am not sure where the ceiling is for me in this respect.

Sarah and I recently had a LONG discussion about this and she really hit the issue home with me. I realized that I really don't have goals in my life. Not only in my life, but as a Pastor. I thought in my head, "Should Pastors have goals"? I mean, the two pastors that I have been around the longest were my dad (he stayed at one church for 30+ years) and Dick Gregg who has been at Central for 15+ years and counting. Neither church is a "big" church. They maintain and keep mostly the same people. Some people come and go. The church that I grew up in and that my Dad was at is dead with only about 10-15 left if that! Did they have goals? I guess that it was subconsciously put in my head that you just maintain. Until recently, I was really ok with that. However, now I am not sure how to get out of the maintaining stage and become a pastor that is...well I don't even know what to call it. Maybe that's the problem...

So, are leaders (GREAT pastors) born or are they made?

SMYG

busy busy busy

Man, things get busier and busier when you get older. Heres what my 10 day outlook looks like:

Today: Worked in the office, worked out, going to the tax office to get taxes done, praise team practice

Tomorrow: Work in the office, decorate the Oasis for the month of March, clean up the house for company, take a nap (HA), entertain friends

Saturday: wake up early and spend the day in Chicago

Sunday: I wont even get started with Sundays

M onday: Going to be in Anderson for my momma surgery (Pray for her will ya)

Tuesday: Back in Plymouth, must get everything done for the week and weekend because...

Wednesday-Saturday: VACATION...I am going to be spending time with my brother at the Big Ten Tourney (GO IU) and then who else knows what

So yeah, busy times. It should be a fun 10 days though!

SMYG.

Thankful

As I have been reading my bible, (yes I am still up to date with my reading!) I am just now getting out of the book of Leviticus and boy am I thankful. I am thankful for many things after reading through this:

Things I have become thankful for:

1. That Jesus was crucified one time for sins committed.

2. That Jesus' death is still enough to pay for the sins of the world

3. That we are under a new covenant and that we dont have to offer a sacrifice every time we mess up (that could get expensive)

4. That God is merciful and gracious to those who love him and are seeking after him

5. That God cared enough about us to help us get closer to Him

6. That I am a friend of God

7. That God forgives AND forgets

In a culture that teaches us to remember what other did to us so you can get them back, Christ lived a life that was in stark constrast. Not only does God cancel our debt to him, he cannot even remember the times we messed up.

SMYG.

A couple of questions for you...

First...

What makes a pastor good?
What makes him successful?
Is there a difference between the two?
Is there a difference between being a good youth pastor and a good pastor?



Second...

I am just wondering who actually reads this blog? So if you could just comment and let me know who is reading it that would be awesome!

Words...

The old saying goes "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me". While that might be good to try and reinforce to a child, it really doesnt fly in the real world does it? Some people wait their whole lives to hear a few words: "I Do", "You are Hired" or "I love you". Then there are other times when you hear things that sometimes really arent said: "You arent thin enough", "For real happiness you need this product or this new car". Many times, when our friends are hurting we are searching for the words that will help them in their situation.

So do words not really hurt us?

Are words not really that important?

Words have the power to many things. James 3 tells us that it is what guides the body. The tongue can praise and uplift like few other things. However, the tongue can cut as deep as any other thing as well. Some things are rough to hear, we might think them or even believe them in our subconscious without ever really saying them.

BUT...here is some things that I have learned in my short 24 years...

1. People always need to know you appreciate them
2. People always want you to listen to them
3. Wherever you are is where you need to be...God put you there
4. People will disappoint you
5. Pastors will disappoint you
6. Family members will let you down
7. True friends, ones who will let you be who you are and still love you, are few and far between
8. Family is important because they will always be there, no matter what
9. God loves me
10. He knows my name
11. He knows what I am going through
12. People will always have selfish ambitions until they commit fully to Christ
13. In a church, no matter large or small, there will ALWAYS be problems
14. Faith should move us to actions
15. Money isnt all it's cracked up to be
16. Happiness is a choice
17. Love is a choice
18. Your attitude is a choice
19. I have been forgiven and that is so beyond me to totally understand and appreciate
20. Finally, as a band once put it in a song, "This is your life, are you who you want to be?" should be a question that we ask often of ourselves.

SMYG

It was bound to happen...

It finally happened. Mike Davis is no longer going to be the coach at Indiana University. He is going to resign at the end of the season. But why the end of the season and not now? I am not an expert but I just wish he would have stepped down now and let IU move on and aggressively start searching for the coach that they need...whoever that is.


Hope your Thursday was as restful as mine...I woke up at 11:30am...it was nice!


SMYG

Day of rest

Today was and is a day off...Sarah and I slept in and worked out...then we had lunch with my uncle Harold...We are chillin' and heading to South Bend to eat at the BoneFish Grill and catch a movie. Should be a good time and a much needed "break" from pastorhood.

SMYG.

God has a plan...

As humans, most of us have a sense of a higher being. No matter if they think it is Allah, Buddah or God. As Christians, we wholeheartedly believe that we serve the one true God. I believe that without a doubt. What I am wondering about today is the whole topic of God's will and predestination and free will. As a good Wesleyan the official answer is that we believe that God knows but he does not ordain or something along those lines. As I was reading my daily passage yesterday it was where Judas and Peter both denied Christ. Judas gave the money back and said that he condemned an innocent man. I have heard it said that Judas might have been trying to accelerate Jesus into restoring Israel because Judas thought he would physically overthrow Roman rule. When Judas realized that Jesus wasnt going to be that revolutionary he was filled with horror! He then went and hung himself...did Judas have the opportunity that Peter had to repent? If it wasnt Judas it would have been someone else. Would they have had a chance for redemption? Peter, one of the most charismatic disciples, denied Jesus three times...the third time cursing even. He went away and wept for forgiveness...that is the opposite to what Judas did...the Bible says that Godly sorrow leads to repentance...but worldly sorrow leads to regret and to death! Judas was filled with regret...Peter was filled with remorse. Where are we at in our lives? Are we full of regret when we get "caught" in sin? Or do we have remorse and truly seek forgiveness?

SMYG

Trying to make sense...

There are times when it seems like life is easy. Not just for you but for those around you, ya know? Good things are happening and everyone is just gellin'. Then, there are times when we get reminded that things are not going to always be easy. What is funny is that nothing that is going on has anything to do with me. It seems that those around me are going through amazing struggles. Struggles that will change their lives and impact the lives of every one around them. It is intense. I am out of words to say to those around me...except playing on my stereo right now is a song that goes something like this:

"He never promised that the cross would not get heavy, or the hill would not be hard to climb. He never offered our victories without fight, but He said that help would always come just in time. So just remember when you're standing in the valley of decision and the adversary says give in...just hold on, our Lord will show up and He will take you through the fire again!"

God never promised that we would always be sitting on the porch drinking lemonade, but he did promise that we would never be forgotten and that we will NEVER have to go through any battle on our own!

SMYG.

Sick in Plymouth

I am sick...there are many things in life that can make you sick...germs, viruses, epidemics, bacteria, allergies, food poisoning, the bird flu, the common cold even. I don't get sick very often except for the last 3 years...I have been getting sick quite a bit. 15 times two years ago, 14 times last year and so far this year only 7 times...what is making me sick you ask? Well I will just put it in a picture...Indiana has lost 4 of their last 5 games and whenever they lose, I feel SICK!!! Physically sick...uggghhh...I think it is time for a new coach before I start getting ulcers!


14-15 in '04
15-14 in '05
13-7 in '06 (so far)

SMYG.

Doing it to the least of these...

In my bible reading for today, it was the passage where Jesus was talking about doing things to the least desirable people that our society creates. Boy, oh boy! How bad am I at that? I think I am a pretty compassionate person but that really makes me wonder how compassionate I really am to everyone. I have times where people are just being punks and I want to take them by the back their necks and stick their head in water like you see in the movies!

That is not my biggest issue here...the monster problem here is how we judge these people. Is it not true that how the church judges people is how our society sees people? The churches gauge of those that walks in comes for what TV and the media tells us is beautiful and are good people. Just take a look when you are in the store the next time at the covers of magazines...they are all full of airbrushed women and men that SEEM perfect but in all reality, it took a lot of computer work to make them look like that...thousands thousands of dollars were spent to make those people look like they do.

We must tell people that it is ok to be who they are and as Christians, we must accept them for who and what they look like.

Show me your glory.

Holding onto a life raft

You know how it works...sometimes, life is just easy. Things are going good and happening very easily. People are doing the things that they should be doing and saying the perfect things at the best times. We have all been there...the top of the mountain, right? Then, on the other side of the coin is the down times. Times when you can never seem to get things done the way you want them, people are making just out right dumb choices in their lives. People during these times, seem to complain and gripe more. I have felt during my most recent "valley" experience, that even if I try my hardest...things and people are never how we really want them to be. So maybe I should try in the next one to just chill out and realize that God loves me no matter what and that I am in a low spot and that is why I am holding onto a life raft. I say this because every time I hit a valley I automatically start to wonder if I am capable of this job or of this or that thing in my life. I start to wonder if I am where God wants me...then after a while, the panic of the "water" in my valley starts to drain away and things are normal again. I guess you could call them pastoral panic attacks!

It's good to know that my actions and past have no affect on whether or not God loves me! He is so patient and faithful that it blows my mind...

Show me your glory.

What do you think?

This is the February newsletter article that I wrote. This is my heart and I felt it needed to be said.


Change Change Change

A few weeks ago, I was talking to my grandmother and we started discussing church. We talked about how it was hard for different generations to gel on some issues. One of the biggest issues is music. My grandpa is one that loves the “good ‘ole” hymns of the church and nothing else. The newer songs are just too fast or too hard to follow and he doesn’t know the words. However, I knew those weren’t the real answer as to why he didn’t like the newer choruses. Then, without having to tell her that I knew why, she told me the answer herself. As they were watching T.V. a word popped up on the screen and grandpa said, “I really don’t like that word at ALL”. After having lived on this earth for over 80 years, I guess you have a right not to like this word. What was the word? Change.
The new thing in our denomination is church planting which is taking a few strong members of the congregation and starting a new branch off of the old church. To be real honest with you, that bothers me a little bit. Why does that bother me? Well, I feel that when you get to the core of why pastors all across our denomination are starting churches off of the old ones is that older churches will not change. If you haven’t noticed, that little hand on the clock never stops ticking (unless the batteries are dead). There is a saying that says, “You can never go home again”. You can go home again but it will never be the same as when you left it. Time marches on. Things change and people change. I am not calling for change just for change sake. I am calling for change for growth sake. Not numbers on Sunday morning or Wednesday night. Not in the amount of tithes and offerings. Spiritual growth.
We say that we want to grow and that is our hearts desire, but what are we doing about it? Are we willing to change some of the traditions and open ourselves up to the surrounding communities? Shiloh is an amazing church. We have so many people with amazing hearts, and hearts that I believe are serving God. However, if there was one word that could describe the overall feeling that I get from our congregation it would be comfortable. We are too comfortable to change, myself included. We like the way we do things and they are always done well. We have good services and Sunday school is attended well. The sermons are always good and I always enjoy when the choir sings! Still, I have been here for over a year and a half and this is a question that lies at the center of this letter: how many new people have came to Shiloh and stayed? I can count maybe 10.
So what should we do? Am I saying that we need to dramatically change everything at Shiloh? By no means. The saying goes, “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” but if it is broke…do something about it! My heart is that God will bring our church together and we will collectively get sick and tired of the same old same old. I know that you are comfortable, but are you comfortable with the people around us not hearing the message of Christ? Are you comfortable with them not going to heaven? Are you comfortable enough to just sit back and leave your spiritual life on cruise control until you get to heaven? This letter might be youthful idealism. Or it might be God calling us all to wake up because our hearts are filled with apathy and complacency. You say, “We are too busy to really commit to this or to that” well that boils down to priorities. I know that there are many things in your lives that are pulling you but I also know that we have plenty of time for the things that we really want to do, I know this because I am guilty of it. We get upset because the music isn’t the way we like it or the sermon went to long, but let me let you in on a little secret. The worship leaders and Pastor John, as well as I, spend time in prayer and preparation to get the music and sermon done for Sunday mornings. Did you spend time in prayer and preparation for the music and sermon or did you just come into church like you were coming into McDonald’s trying to figure out what you wanted that day?
Change is going to come. Either we will be a part of it, or we won’t be around to see it happen. Change is not always good, but it is not always bad either. Shiloh is full of love and compassion and I feel we need to share that with those around us. Change for change sake is not what Christ calls us to; he calls us to change for spiritual growth sake.

Show me your glory.

Good Morning...

I hope your weekend was great and you got a lot of you time. We had a great time at the Renewal weekend.

At the weekend, the speaker said something that really got me thinking. He said that as Pastors, we need to do our best to make sure that our kids don't grow up as Pastors Kids. We all know the type...getting all of the attention at church, always as the example for the other teens yada yada yada...he was not worried about what the church thought about his kids or what they thought they should be like. I think that most churches dont have a true grasp on what they do to PK's...they really put a lot of pressure on kids...I know...I was there. I pray that when I have kids that I will have the same courage that this family did and let my kids be kids and tell them not to do things because mom and dad says they are wrong rather than the church thinks the pastors family shouldnt be doing something.

What do you think are some ways to be a pastor and not raise a PK?



Show me your glory.

Going away...

Sarah and I are about to leave for the Indiana North District's first annual Youth Pastor and Spouse renewal weekend. It is in Ft. Wayne and we will having a good time with other YP's from the district...we need to get away. Have a great weekend...



Show me your glory.

!$@# #%&^

I have found it interesting, ever since I went to college right up to this day, that even those that claim to be Christians use curse words. Growing up, I was RARELY around anyone who was a Christian and heard them use those words. Then in college, I had teachers use them in class...I heard leaders on campus use them and the list goes on and on. There was even a "person" in my church who is the town crier about the passage in Ephesians on unwholesome talk that cursed in the course of our conversation over a meal a couple of times. So taking away what the Bible has to say, I think that there is a deeper issue here than using a few words here or there. I think as Americans, we are under the impression that we can say what we want to and we dont care who hears us or what it means to others. Using words like that almost make me think that people just do not have enough control over themselves to not say things like that. It usually happens when they are upset...usually. So is using "cuss" words wrong? I mean, even when I went to a southern state to try out for a job there, the pastor used the other word for poop and thought nothing of it really. So am I just one of those old men who sit around on the porch mumbling under my breath about this? Maybe...but maybe...we could all use a little more self-control.

Show me your glory.

Questions...

Adam and Eve did it.
Abraham did.
Isaac did it.
Jacob did it.
David did it.

Those are a who's who list of the heroes of our faith right? So how is it that God continually blessed them time after time after time when they messed up and sinned as we do? Abraham lied about Sarah... and Jacob decieved his father after God told Rebekah that Jacob would be blessed rather than Esau so did God ordain Jacob's lying? Does God bless those who sin? Does he bless who he is going to bless and it really doesnt matter what they do?

Now, I know that these guys were faithful and all that accompanies being a hero of the faith...but I can't help but wonder...why does God bless these guys and not others? Should we take it with a "Come what may" attitude? I am not saying that I want to be rich or that I want to be a King or father of many nations or whatever...but I was under the impression...tell me if you were too...that those who were sinning would not be blessed by God. Any one else think that? I mean, look in Genesis...these guys didnt stop and pray after they had committed the sin...they just went on and some gave excuses but for the most part they all went away with more than what they had before the act occured. Just wondering what you thought...puzzled in plymouth.



Show me your glory.